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And also...

David interviews Margaret Cho

read the handblog...

1/31/2005

My Way of Life

Let's see, this weekend..., Well, there was...No...,can't talk about that. Then there was uh...,well, maybe I shouldn't discuss that either.

I did have a very nice meeting with the women's accessories manager at Barneys, so I spent a lot of the weekend working on a CD and internet presentation for New York City. I ALSO met with Taylor Ross to go over the demo he's constructed for the new prom song aptly titled, 'It's the Prom!' I think this one is a keeper. I'm very pleased. Taylor also turned Margaret White's 'Say It' into an entirely new beast. A Pentecostal delight. It should shake the rafters, and the new Chris Hargenson/Sue Snell song is coming along, but not quite there yet.

I saw 'In Good Company' with Christopher and Ludwig Saturday night and I enjoyed it very much. More so then I expected. Tonight is the first SCARRIE pre-production meeting and should be interesting.

Vague? Me? Darling, if I told you all of my secrets you'd have no reason to come back...,

For now you may educate yourself on the fabulous Miss Yvonne DeCarlo. She's not dead yet!

posted by David on 1/31/2005 08:39:00 PM | Link |

 

1/28/2005

My Way of Life

Last night I participated in a rehearsal for a reading of Charles Busch's Red Scare on Sunset and we all had a really fun time. The play is one my favorites by Mr. Busch. It's the story of Mary Dale, a movie star and loving wife in the 1950's, who finds herself in the midst of a communist conspiracy to do away with the old Hollywood star system. It has the feel of a Loretta Young/Lana Turner/Joan Crawford/Women in peril film from that decade and the story is both deadly funny and deadly serious. I read the role of Mary Dale and it's a wonderful part. Hilarious Handbaggers Brannen Daugherty, Ed Jones and Tim Howard participated as well along with some fresh young blood.

Yes, I'm at work but will be leaving early as I normally do on Fridays and I'll be heading out to Barney's to show them the new Spring/Summer line of exquisite Lucy Notion headbands that I'm representing. I could hardly believe I got an appointment, but if there;s one thing I learned in the crazy biz we call 'show', you have to be persistent and just ASK. It never hurts to ask. NO is just a two letter word, who's pain can easily be forgotten with a YES. Please send good thoughts my way.

posted by David on 1/28/2005 08:27:00 PM | Link |

 

1/27/2005

My Way of Life

Sorry for the brief Blog but sometimes everything in Handbag is not for the public consumption. You only want the glamour and the glitz, but let me tell you buster, it takes, blood, sweat and quite a few tears to create the Shangri-La you call Hell in a Handbag! Do you hear me? BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD!

posted by David on 1/27/2005 11:15:00 PM | Link |

 

1/26/2005

My Way of Life

More proof that the heterosexual lifestyle is sick and perverted.

posted by David on 1/26/2005 10:45:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

Breaking news..., Mouse bites fat guys foot. No, seriously..,

posted by David on 1/26/2005 10:14:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

File this under EWWWW!!!!! If I see anybody drinking this I will publicly mock them.

posted by David on 1/26/2005 08:04:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

Serenity.

posted by David on 1/26/2005 06:30:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

MORE.
What's for dinner tonight?

posted by David on 1/26/2005 06:24:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

But it's got writing all over it...,

posted by David on 1/26/2005 05:05:00 PM | Link |

 

1/25/2005

My Way of Life

Good Lord, I'm getting gayer by the moment. I told my friend Cara, who I hadn't seen in 11 years that I was turning into an old queen, based on the fact that I had become a huge Joan Crawford fan since I last saw her (Cara, not Joan Crawford) . Now I think these friggin' Handbaggers are rubbing off on me. I bought the cast recordings of Parade and Avenue Q with a gift certificate I received.

I really tried to get something the kids are listening to but the last item I got like that was Miss Gwen Stefani's solo effort which was a bit of a disappointment in my mind. I appreciate her retro bubblegum sensibilities and her apparent nod to Lene Lovich (whether she knows it or not) with her Grammy nominated (bullshit- I hate the fucking Grammys) super catchy song, 'What You Waiting For', but ultimately it's sort of boring and not very adventurous. And how many frigging times can you sing the praises of Harajuku Girls? We get it Gwen, you like them! This takes me back to the solo effort of a Miss Debbie Harry- with a little ditty entitled 'Koo-Koo'. A monumental flop produced by Niles Rodgers. Of course Debbie was the first to get Niles who later went on to great success producing Diana Ross, David Bowie and, uh...Madonna..., but Koo-Koo still is an interesting if not flawed venture. She took risks, which is something that Miss Stefani doesn't do. Could it be that there are no more risks to take? Sad. This my dear readers is why I must listen to standard singer like Ella, Rosemary and Lena, and buy the cast recordings that my fellow actors incessantly talk about. I need something new, and for me, this is new.

posted by David on 1/25/2005 05:43:00 PM | Link |

 

1/24/2005

My Way of Life

Holy shit. I'm freaking out. This is bigger then 'Roots'. I don't even know where to begin.
Each week one actress will be eliminated with Faye saying, 'Don't call us, we'll call you'...,
We've got to find a way to get BC KALZ on this thing.

posted by David on 1/24/2005 10:36:00 PM | Link |

 

1/23/2005

My Way of Life

Chicago is covered in a blanket of snow. Lots of snow. Tons of it. Shitloads. Chris has been gone all day and I took it upon myself to shovel and shovel and shovel, even though we have people who are supposed to do it for us in our building. I wanted make sure I had plenty of room to pull in and out. After I shoveled I saw the cop that lives across the alley that looks like the Family Guy telling these poor saps where they could and couldn't throw their snow. God forbid he would have to take a few steps out of his fat ass way..., This is the same cop that goes though his or other peoples garbage and inspects mail in his unsightly tight shorts.

I thought the gym would be empty but it appears that others had thought as well as it was rather crowded for a Blizzard day. None of the people that really annoy me were there, like Bossy Gay Everybody Loves Raymond Guy or pea head man, or the guy who just STARES at me- I think he's a 'fan'. Taylor Ross, one of my musical collaborators was there. I immediately asked him why he wasn't at home working on the new SCARRIE music I gave him. He came up with some lame excuse about taking a break or something, so I let it slide.

I spent the beginning of the week in beautiful Harrisburg, MO, right near Columbus. Now you know where it is, right? I was reconnecting with a friend I hadn't seen in over 11 years and it was just like we'd just seen each other the week before, only we hadn't drank 118 gallons of alcohol and sniffed whatever powdered substance we could get up our noses. Who says you can't go home again? By the way, now I like pit bulls and guns. Toodles!

posted by David on 1/23/2005 04:59:00 AM | Link |

 

1/17/2005

My Pink Way of Life


Mariska is very excited..., Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/17/2005 08:21:00 AM | Link |

 


Okay, so I ended up watching most of the Golden Globe awards tonight and although I normally don't give this kind of thing much attention I have to say I was touched to see Mariska Hargitay not only win her award (finally), but acknowledge her mother and pay tribute to her her father, pop icon, Mickey Hargitay, who was actually with her. Why the hell am I posting this? Don't you know? Mariska's mother is none other then Miss Jayne Mansfield, my favorite blonde bombshell from the 60's. Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/17/2005 08:20:00 AM | Link |

 

1/14/2005

My Way of Life

No, wait! It was Three's Company! You know..., uh...,the one where Mrs. Roper was missing...,

posted by David on 1/14/2005 05:34:00 PM | Link |

 

1/13/2005

My Way of Life

Jesus H. Christ...,

posted by David on 1/13/2005 11:53:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

QUESTION: Is Mr. Blackwell DEAD yet?
ANSWER: Apparently not.

posted by David on 1/13/2005 06:42:00 PM | Link |

 

1/12/2005


Shut up! I'm ACTING! Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/12/2005 09:14:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

"How deliciously prompt! You're only an hour late!"

These are the first words uttered by Miss Joan Crawford in 'Eyes', 1/3 of Rod Serling's Night Gallery trilogy with the then up and coming young director, Mr. Steven Spielberg. I ended up watching a couple of episodes of the pilot last night as I finally had the time to start taking apart my Holiday decorations. Tearing down my happy Christmas village is a bitch, because everything has to be wrapped individually and there are boxes for each house and cottage and special holders for each little figurine. Perhaps watching Joan, as the rich, selfish, blind woman, Claudia Menlo , who is the sole occupant of an ivory tower like high rise -inspired me to work on removing the holiday decorations with even more care and detail then I imagined myself capable of for I found myself wrapping things in plastic, much the way Joan herself wrapped her upholstered furniture in her real life ivory New York tower. Needless to say my pans to go to the gym or work on more SCARRIE changes were dashed to the ground like so many bits of shattered glass. You really must see this Night Gallery collection, although I later found out that Universal Studios didn't even bother to re-master the prints or include any extra special features or interviews. The FANS are not happy about this..., I did notice the DVD is clearer then the video print I have, so for now I'm satisfied. The episode I watched from the pilot was 'The Escape Route' with Richard Kiley as a former Nazi soldier hiding out in South America haunted by his past and painting that beckons him to the peace and paradise he yearns for. I remember seeing this when I was 8 years old and it scared the hell out of me and it still does, only now I understand what's going on. What did I know about the holocaust at 8? Watching it today with it's disturbing subject and very adult situations I'm surprised I was allowed to watch it, but my parents probably didn't understand it either, although they usually allowed me to watch scary movies. However when they came out with the 'Due to the subject of the matter, parental discretioni s advised' label they started censoring my viewing habits prohibiting me to watch 'Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman'. I had to sneakily watch 'Monty Python's Flying Circus' when I discovered it in 7th grade. The minute my parents saw men parading around in dresses they freaked out. Poetic justice?

posted by David on 1/12/2005 05:52:00 PM | Link |

 

1/11/2005

My Way of Life

As Linda Rogo said to Mike Rogo after the ship capsized, you're probably thinking, "Where the hell were you?"..., I was in rain soaked California for the past 5 days. Northern on business, and Southern for pleasure. Yes, Handbaggers, I hate to burst any bubbly delusions you may have about me, but I too have to work a normal, crummy, boring 9-5 job to help supplement this thing called everyday living.

Nothing like flying 4 1/2 hours to sit on your ass all day to listen to product managers excitedly describe the new features and links on our website for 8 hours. Mind you, I don't have it as bad as some. I'm fortunate to have a very good boss who knows what I do after work and treats me with the respect a micro-celebrity of my stature deserves.

The second half of my trip was much better despite the rain. I met my Christopher in Orange County for Marianne's surprise birthday party. Now, you usually have to reach a certain age to merit a surprise party of the this level, and since Marianne reads this Blog regularly I will not mention that age because she showers me with wonderful gifts like the Blondie Live by Request DVD that I almost bought myself (I bought the CD). Chris and his family are very close- closer then I am with my family, and I am treated as a full fledged member of this family which means that Chris' nephews beat on me whenever they get a chance to. Another highlight of the trip was an evening with Jill, my friend Cara's fabulous mom. I had heard so much about this woman over the years it was kind of surreal meeting her but she certainly didn't disappoint. She's just really cool, and has the props to back to support that adjective from her vintage MG to her Parisian style apartment. She took Christopher and myself on a culinary adventure to Basalic, a restaurant that was tres chic! Much more foo-foo then this Hammond, IN boy is used to, but I certainly enjoyed the attention and the company. This was not a dinner, it was an experience and Chris and I loved it. Jill brought her friends Michael and Alison. Michael owns a gallery in Newport Beach and Alison is an actress. You may know her form the Lexus holiday commercial where the spouses and/or loved ones are being surprised with a new car. She plays the excited wife in the driveway.

I am currently working on SCARRIE rewrites and other exciting projects, and since I should go back to work, I think I'll do that just that.

posted by David on 1/11/2005 04:42:00 PM | Link |

 

1/05/2005

MY WAY OF LIFE- NEW YEARS EVE FOR 2005!


Jayne Mansfield herself, BC Kalz w/ Cate Mannion and Ed Jones. My goodness, wasn't Ed holding a bottle of beer in the last photo? Perhaps it's the same bottle from the last picture. See any dented cabs New Years Day? Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/05/2005 06:36:00 AM | Link |

 


Ed , Brannen and our jailbait, lighting and sound man, Andy. I think I scared him..., Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/05/2005 06:34:00 AM | Link |

 


New York sensation Jere Williams on the left with entourage. Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/05/2005 06:33:00 AM | Link |

 


Dancing machine Melissa Pond and her admirerers Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/05/2005 06:33:00 AM | Link |

 


The entire Rudolph cast! It took us a while to find Lori Lee. She mysteriously disappeared , like a puff of smoke..., Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/05/2005 06:32:00 AM | Link |

 


Me and my sweet little Rudolph, Brannen Daugherty. Tim Piotrowski said I looked like a mime that night and damn him if he wasn't right! A mime in Gaultier! Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/05/2005 06:30:00 AM | Link |

 


These are the kind of backstage antics I shall miss. This is the stud wall of support comprised of Zach and Troy while Brigitte turns from Mrs. Jane Donner to Dolly, the misfit toy.That's a frantic Donna in the middle. Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/05/2005 06:29:00 AM | Link |

 


Blow is just an expression. A happy new Handbag fan. Posted by Hello

posted by David on 1/05/2005 06:27:00 AM | Link |

 

1/04/2005

My Way of Life

Just when I thought The Biggest Loser was the most pathetic reality show this comes along. I watched about 15 minutes of it as I folded Rudolph costumes, mouth agape. John Waters should jump on this bandwagon and get housewives to eat shit. Oh wait, there's already Fear Factor. Paddy Chayefsky was indeed a prophet.

posted by David on 1/04/2005 08:05:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

Hate.

posted by David on 1/04/2005 06:59:00 PM | Link |

 

My Way of Life

All right . I suck. I'm a bad Blogger. I will never be nominated for a Blogger award like my friend Jake, or NOFO as he's known in Blogger circles. Vote for his ass. He's nominated for a BOB which I hear is even better then a cable ACE Award. His Blog is always interesting. Sometimes painfully honest, but at least he doesn't BS. Too bad my good friend Jere Williams wasn't nominated. What an injustice! They care about their writing. I kind of wing it. Like the other day I saw this bird, and oh, never mind..., I promise to post NYE pics tomorrow, I went to the gym and I'm tired and it's midnight and my daddy is hollering at me to come to bed.

posted by David on 1/04/2005 06:58:00 AM | Link |

 

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