and also in Los Angeles...
and also in Baltimore...
Blogs We Love
A Hole In The Head
People We Love
The Official Carol Lynley Home Page
10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003
And also...David interviews Margaret Cho
read the handblog...
My new Blogger profile pic- Thanks photoshop!
posted by David on 2/27/2005 11:15:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life
I'm a Fabulous Faggot! I’m the epitome of over the top breathtakingly extravagant faggot chic. I dance like a big queer demon, although I am more concerned about being seen than actually enjoying myself. I probably wear feathers. Jesus Christ.What kind of Faggot are you?
Brought to you by Pushing Through
posted by David on 2/27/2005 10:50:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life
Let's not forget Merrie Greenfield channeling Jodie Foster in 'Nell' in The Last Two Minutes of the Complete Works of Henrik Ibsen at the Neo Futurarium (I hate spelling that) GO SEE IT!
posted by David on 2/27/2005 05:23:00 AM | Link |
Neato 'Curse of the Crying Heart' trading cards
posted by David on 2/27/2005 05:19:00 AM | Link |
My Way of LifeLive theater- there's nothing like it...,
Had a showbiz couple of days so far. Yesterday I hooked up with local boy made good, really good. Denis O'Hare who you theater types will know as the Tony award winning actor from 'Take Me Out'. Denis honed his acting chops here in Chicago and I've known him about 12 years. I wasn't involved or even thinking about theater when I originally met Denis but we have kept in touch and he's one of the nice guys. The kind that says 'sure' when you contact him about meeting for coffee before performing in Sweet Charity at the Cadillac Palace w/Miss Applegate. He's been working his ass off, so he could have easily passed. We had a nice long chat on about everything from the 'business', to people he's worked with, the METH epidemic, and of course, politics. Denis is very passionate about his politics and how it effects us all and he had some pretty eye-opening topics. I think I'm going to see him perform tomorrow.
Afterwards I saw The House Theatre's Curse of the Crying Heart and, since I hate describing shows, all I have to say is this is a must see. That Nathan Allen is a clever muthafucka', and it was great seeing Molly Brennan kick some serious ass onstage along with a very good Carolyn Defrin- no I don't know her-but I will..., The direction(Dennis Watkins) was fab and the music (Kevin O'Donnell) just the way I liked it-LOUD. Don't hesitate- just go.
Today I visited Taylor Ross and listened to what he's done with my Sue Snell/Chris Hargenson duet, 'Do It For Me', and I was extremely pleased. We spent a lot of time going through guilty 70's pleasures and I sang for the possible second act opening number for him improvising the lyrics that I hadn't written. God, I wish I had a BEAUTIFUL voice. But, we get what we get and deal with it.
Afterwards I auditioned for a show. Yes, they made your mother audition, and I had to sing. Miraculously I have a callback scheduled- the day I get back from my vacation.
Did I mention vacation? I'll be in Puerto Vallarta, the land that my partner worships for a little over a week., but I will keep you posted, for I live to Blog you. I'm gonna Blog your brains out.
posted by David on 2/27/2005 03:37:00 AM | Link |
My Way of LifeEd Jones sent this link to me. I think it speaks for itself. I think it's one of his relatives.
posted by David on 2/26/2005 06:47:00 AM | Link |
My Way of LifeThe Flipside of the Chicago Free Press-
Thanks to Fausto Fernos I was alerted to a Louis Weisberg column addressing the same issues that Paul 'History of Mankind' Varnell's column.
Mr. Weisberg's column is well written and thought out and is a credit to the paper. If you like it, let him know at Weisberg@chicagofree-press.com
You can also tell Paul Varnell what you think of his column at firstname.lastname@example.org
posted by David on 2/25/2005 07:59:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeThank God we have Paul Varnell of the Chicago Free Press to explain drug addiction to us. Of course all of the true geniuses with razor insight are working there. Is it me or is this man one of the most imperious blowhards who has no idea what he's talking about columnist that I've read in a long time. Thanks for the history of mankind, Paul..., Why is the Free Press printing this?
This is my opinion not the company's. Actually I enjoy the Chicago Free Press very much. Except for the Paul Varnell idiot, I mean columnist.
posted by David on 2/25/2005 07:13:00 AM | Link |
My Way of LifeWhat the hell?
I was doing a simple search on Ryan Carnes the blonde 'teenager' that was found nude in the pool making out with forehead lady's son, because I learned he was bare-nekkid in a film he did, and I found the above link. Of course I can't post the nude photos I found of him.
Some muthf*cka done saw our name and stole it, I just know it!
posted by David on 2/25/2005 06:53:00 AM | Link |
My Way of Life- Church Lady RantDear Handbaggers, not all of my posts can be about Joan Crawford, the lady on the corner who amuses me or the progress of our latest shows. Sometimes it just gets to the point where ya' gotta' say SOMETHING.
Allow me to pull out my Chanel soapbox while I precariously stand on it in my Prada boots, for Lord knows, I'm NO role model, but when I read something like this, I have to wonder, what the fuck is going on?
I suppose the Howard Brown story, compiled with the sad tale of the Hearts Foundation founder and city AIDS liaison Michael L. Jackson running over a cabdriver 3 times allegedly in self-defense just magnifies this insanity. Particularly when I see events like The Fireball or Hearts Party that laughingly pass as AIDS benefits when one just wonders how many cases of HIV are transmitted as a result of these very parties? This was brought home to me when I participated in Fausto Fernos' Feast of Fools show. The wraparound story in the show was the actual sponsor of the Circuit Party (I forgot what Fausto named it), was actually a key owner of the drug companies that manufactured the HIV drugs. The evil premise being, they host these parties to spread the plague to increase their customer base. After what I've been reading this idea doesn't seem too far off base.
I can see a younger person wanting to dance the night away, and drink and such, but most of the people I know, as they get lives, shelf that activity in their late 20's or 30's. What keeps them going all night? My guess is the METH...,
Anybody who knows me knows I'm not a prude. I'm a big lush from way back and I've done many unprintable things. If you want to party all night, then go dance, if you want to dive into a pile of naked men (or women) and experience the sensation of 7 mouths on your body at once then by all means go for it, but please, please, please think twice before getting involved in the vicious meth cycle. Besides, it's a lot more fun when you're aware of what's happening. I've seen people die from it, and it's a pathetic way to go. Apparently you get so amped from the stuff you go to extremes to come down and the combination can be lethal. That's how the person I knew died. The funny thing about this is, all of his PNP partners came and were weeping and wailing and comforting his family. PNP means 'Party and Play'. Since I'm an old lady I had to ask one of my friends in the know about this.
So, in conclusion. I'm all for free love, and I'm not even going to go into how you choose to execute your thingee-things. I am not the condom police... but for God's sake watch out. It's SO easy to get caught up in seemingly wonderful escape of any kind of drug. You end up doing things you regret. I oughta know...,
posted by David on 2/24/2005 09:30:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life3 conversations snippets in three days. I guess I'm just one of those people that other like to talk to.
At the dentist Saturday.
Patient: I don't know why they be havin' to drill holes in my head all the time!
Me: (Half hearted smile) that's what they do, ha-ha..., (thinking -please call my name next)
Nurse: David Cerda
Me: ZZZZZZIPPPP!!!! (that's the cartoon sound of me running into the dentists chair)
At the gym in the steamroom
Gorgeous built Latin man: (looking at me- finally says) You can jack off if you want. I don't care.
Me: (Thinking) You sweet talker you..., Actually saying: Uh, ditto.
At the Jewel grocery store on Clark in Andersonville (After gym)
Rainman bagger: (sees spaghetti) I love spaghetti.
Rainman bagger: It's my favorite, I could eat it everyday, Monday though Friday!
Me: What about Saturday and Sunday?
Rainmen bagger: Yeah! Saturday and Sunday too.
Me: That's a lot of spaghetti...,
Rainmen bagger: It's my FAVORITE!
Me: Sounds like it. See you later.
Rainman bagger: BYE!
posted by David on 2/24/2005 07:31:00 AM | Link |
My Way of LifeLast nights final show Homo Solo show went very well and what made extra nice was the familiar faces in the audience. I had a slight sound cue issue but being the pro I am I covered for it. I think I'm going to develop this piece and take it on the road, baby. Maybe one day perform it for Ms. Harry herself- like say when I run into her in NYC. I'll just follow her as she walks her dog and wait until she calls the police on me.
Shows to see: I've been neglectful in my duties regarding shows worth your your while.
Friday I saw Handbag superstar Merrie Greenfield and Handbag potential superstar Michael Kingston in the Neo-Futurists The Last Two Minutes of the Complete Works of Henrik Ibsen, a very silly, fast paced Monty Python-esque piece that, in the wrong hands could turn out less then good, but Greg Allen's ambition pays off, thanks to his immensely talented and capable cast which also includes Dina Connelly (who portrayed Cheryl Crane in acclaimed and strikingly handsome playwright Edward Thomas Herrera's 'Death On a Pink Carpet', Sarah (ironic curtsey) Clark, the always engaging Joe Dempsey, and a very funny Steve Walker. I know next to nothing about Ibsen since he never appeared on a sitcom or bad 70's movie and I actually enjoyed the hell out if it. Go see it.
Wonderboy, and my good friend (I got that from Faye Dunaway- you have to read her biography to get it) Nathan Allan and his gang at The House Theater are currently presenting the sequel to his Lynchian San Valentino trilogy, The Curse of the Crying Heart at the Viaduct Space. How could you resist little Nate dressed in a cowboy outfit singing his heart out. They should do promos at leather bars- there's an untapped market there! Honestly - I've yet to see the show but Nate has never disappointed me.
Now I'm back to SCARRIE and I'm looking forward to it. There are scenes to be rearranged/changed/deleted, questions to be answered, characters to be fleshed out and songs to be rewritten. Audition dates will be announced soon!
posted by David on 2/23/2005 05:21:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeSo last nights Solo Homo went better then expected for me. Even when I discovered I needed to make cuts an hour before the performance. I had fun and the audience was very supportive. I did see a few familiar faces. Jason Freeman and Bill Haddad attended and Mr. Larry Bommer, who I pray wasn't there to review the event, since it's only a 2 day affair. Some very talented participants. Something for everybody, and it's only 5 bucks!
I'm currently working a new SCARRIE song under consideration for a 2nd Act opener- it's a keeper.
Saturday I helped celebrate the birthday of acclaimed playwright/performer and the fantastically handsome Edwardo Thomas-Herrera. For a last minute party it was quite the well attended affair, and Chris and I had lovely time with David and Edward and two women who I thought were lesbians but weren't. They spoke of a home in Michigan and Labradors- how could they NOT be gay? Damn it, that's what stereotypes are for.
Speaking of funny gay stereotypes, check out the hotties in the Mr. Gay Wisconsin 2005. I particularly like the 'formal wear' pictures..., Don't blame me, I was doing a search for the fabulous Joel Duffrin, one of the Solo Homo performers from Wisconsin- blame him.
I was pleased to see my top pick, Patty Bouvier outed this past Sunday on The Simpsons episode. I thought the episode was well done and very silly making fun of everybody involved, and I'm wondering if the writers deliberately were paying tribute to Fred G. Sanford and Aunt Esther with the constant bickering of Homer and Patty. The image of Homer being married to himself won't soon leave my mind and I expect to see the this image at the next Bear event since cartoon characters seem to be their favorite role models...,
posted by David on 2/22/2005 06:34:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life
Debbie in Marilyn Monroe's burnt dress from the Seven Year Itch, in the burnt kitchen, 17th Street apartment- photo by Chris Stein
This is the from the series of pictures that actually led me to the road to Debbie Harry. Tomorrow and the next day I will be performing/reading Debbie Harry Saved My Life for Solo Homo at the Bailiwick theater at 7:30pm.
I will probably be the only person there who wasn't able to memorize his piece.
posted by David on 2/21/2005 05:47:00 AM | Link |
My Way of Life"I don't want no fat chick serving me drinks"...,
posted by David on 2/18/2005 08:18:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeThink you know HELL?
posted by David on 2/17/2005 09:15:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeThis Blog BS finally seems resolved. For some reason I thought it was a personal attack on my deep and important thoughts but I guess it was just a glitch that has been fixed. Lots of things going on. I majorly blew a 'creative' meeting I was supposed to have with a fellow artistic director tonight because I fell asleep when I came home from work. How embarrassing and unprofessional. I felt like an idiot but the person in question was very gracious and probably realized I was very old and this tends to happen from time to time. Many , many ,many things to do.
First and foremost memorize and complete my piece for SOLO HOMO 3 at the Bailwick Theater 02/21,22 at 7:30. I would advise yo to attend Tuesday..., My piece is entitled Debbie Harry Saved My Life and you would think that would be easy for me to write. So did I..., but it's been a struggle, dear reader.
Yesterday I finally mailed in a form that essentially gives me permission to use a Camille Paglia quote in the adaptation of 'The Birds' we performed in 2001. Ms. Paglia was delighted to be a character in the play. For all of you newcomers, 'The Birds' is not the Aristophanes piece but the good one- the Hitchcock film. I wrote it with Pauline Pang and we performed it when we were with Sweetback Productions. I'm making it a point to get all my t's crossed and I's dotted for things I've written and thought it might be a good idea to get permission from Ms. Paglia to use a direct quote from her book Sexual Personae, that was actually added by Ms. Pang. Yale Publishing and Camille said yes and all I had to do was ask. Scary, huh?
posted by David on 2/17/2005 06:24:00 AM | Link |
My Way of LifeTesting...,
posted by David on 2/17/2005 06:22:00 AM | Link |
My Way of LifeIn case you were wondering...,
posted by David on 2/16/2005 10:52:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeOh...nevermind...,
posted by David on 2/16/2005 06:35:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeThis Blogger crap is driving me crazy- Mucho 'error' messages thus the lack of Blogs.
posted by David on 2/16/2005 06:33:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeOkay, here's what's going on. I 'm getting a 'technical difficulties' message whenever I try to Blog from work now which is a pain in my big ass. I'm fine, Jim Glaub is going to NYC. Andy Eninger was fantastic in his Second City mainstage debut, I nearly cried. SCARRIE is moving alomg with great ideas and some cool new songs and changes and I have to go to bed now before I get in trouble.
posted by David on 2/16/2005 06:47:00 AM | Link |
My Way of LifeBIG news! Gayco superstar and former King Moon Racer and Handbag friend Andy Eninger will be appearing on Second City's mainstage show Red Scare tonight and tomorrow. The 8pm show for tomorrow is already sold out so you should call to reserve you seats to see one of the funniest people I know fulfill his dream of performing in a Second City mainstage show. The number is 312.337.3992. I will be there tomorrow at the 11pm show, so I hope to see you.
posted by David on 2/10/2005 06:14:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeVOTE FOR JOAN! Turner Classic Movies is having a fun little contest involving performances that should have won Oscars and certainly Joan Crawford's pre-Glenn Close Fatal Attraction performance in 'Possessed' qualifies. It's among her best- I swear. Much better then that Loretta Young hack.
Funny story- Loretta the ultra-conservative Catholic Goddess used to keep a 'swear jar' on the set of her pictures charging people something like .50 per offense. Finally a crew member who had enough of her holier then thou routine took some money out of his pocket and said, "Here's ten bucks, now go fuck yourself!"
It was later learned that Loretta had an illegitimate child with Clark Gable (a long time lover of Joans), pretended like she adopted the child and didn't tell her daughter about it until it was forced out of her when the poor woman (her daughter) turned 30. Just like me. Well, Clark Gable isn't my father but I went though a similar situation..., Good thing my mother will never read this.
posted by David on 2/09/2005 11:34:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeFrom the Chicago Tribune' "The attorneys said they were not ready to discuss whether alcohol or drugs could have played a role, though Erickson said he was not aware of Jackson having a history of substance abuse."
Jesus, let's HOPE alcohol and drugs were involved. What kind of monster would do this without them? Tragic.
ADDENDUMDEEDUM- This all happened outside the door of Handbag ensemble member Brooke Allen who apparently did nothing about it. The link is not Brooke, it's most likely a boring singer/songwriter.
posted by David on 2/08/2005 11:58:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeAnd then she tore off her top put on a banana skirt and sang 'Don't Touch My Tomatos'...,
posted by David on 2/08/2005 08:05:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeDid I tell you about Saturday? Well, I went to dinner with the Tims, Brigitte and Dan and was supposed to go the Neo Futurists Ibsen play featuring Merrie Greenfield and Michael Kingston, directed by Greg Allen, but unforeseen circumstances (domestic squabble) nixed that. After dinner I went home to make amends to my honey but he wasn't home. He decided to channel his energy into work and was at the office. I made sure things were square with us and decided to finally see the band that two my SCARRIE band boys, Taylor Ross and Aaron Smith are in, FLESH HUNGRY DOG , a queer rock band, that I plan on stealing. Aren't all rock bands inherently queer? They were performing in a benefit for the Gay Games that are supposedly coming to Chicago. The types of competition boggles the mind, but that's another Blog.
The opening act was GAYCO. Well, not all of them but enough of them including my good friend, the adorable Andy Eninger, who I haven't seen in quite some time. After their set Andy and I hung out and watched Flesh Hungry Dog. Fun guys- and it was great to catch up with the very talented Mr. Eninger. Andy was our leather Cabaret emcee King Moon Racer in Rudolph a few years ago (of course I dressed him as little as possible), and he's one of the most gifted comedic actors and improvisers I know.
After the set Taylor and his boyfriend Brent (or is it Brett?) convinced me to go to The Eagle for their 'lights out' party. Grandma Goes Wild! First a rock band in a bar then a leather bar all in one night! The 'lights out' crap just made it difficult to identify the money to pay for drinks. What an annoying concept. I was accosted by a man in his 50's who claimed he knew me and quickly slipped his hand up my shirt. Rather then flinch and scream I just looked at him and and said 'Who are you?' He told me, "I know you, you from a long time ago. You're a very nice guy". I thanked him and walked away. You see, when you've spent the better part of 1980-1992 in an alcoholic haze you get this from time to time.
posted by David on 2/08/2005 05:32:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeDavid Byrne, a real charmer..., Jeez, dude, lighten up! No wonder I never I never really got into the Talking Heads...,
posted by David on 2/07/2005 09:36:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeWhat do Irwin Allen movies and George Dubya have in common? More then you think. If you have to register it's worth the read.
posted by David on 2/04/2005 09:16:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeI was a guest on Madge Weinstein's Yeast Radio show last night, and it isn't live-thank God. Check out the picture of me performing at the Feast of Fools show on Madge's website. Of course she manages to make me look fat! Some of the content of the show was edited to protect the innocent. Click here to download the show. Please forgive my rather 'blue' language. I had to go along with hostesses agenda. I tried my best to mention all of Handbags projects and the people involved but Madge runs the show. I have to admit I had a fabulous time dishing with Madge. She lives in a glamourous retro 70's penthouse on Marine Drive and is pretty tech savvy for a fat old Jewish lesbian. There are over 3,000 Podcasts around the world and Madge's show is in the TOP 20, so for my own selfish reasons I'm hoping to get rid of, I mean sell- some Poseidon or Rudolph CD's to help finance SCARRIE The Musical. What's that you say? You haven't had a chance to contribute to the not-for- profit corporation known as Hell in a Handbag? Well darling, redemption is just a click away!
posted by David on 2/04/2005 04:36:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeOkay, tonight I am to be a guest on Madge Weinstein's Yeast Radio show. I have no idea if it's live or what. It's a 'podcast'- that's what all the kids are listening to- and Madge recently made international headlines when former MTV VJ and Adam Curry ( a supposed Podcasting pioneer) became a Madge fan and was shocked to find out that Madge may indeed be a HE. I'm doubting they have aptitude tests down at the MTV VJ hiring place. What a vicious rumor! I mean granted, Madge is no raving beauty, but Madge is definitely a woman.
Madge has this link about Podcasting...,
posted by David on 2/03/2005 10:04:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeIn the Good News/Bad News Department:
A 25th anniversary edition of my favorite Scorsese movie Raging Bull will be released February 8 with all sort of goodies. At times the movie can be difficult to watch but Scorsese and DeNiro manage to turn the creature that is Jake LaMotta (he's still very much alive) into an amazing piece of film and I dare I say, a work of art..., The ensemble is fucking incredible with just about every actor you've ever seen in a gangster film including Coach from 'Cheers', Deniro, Joe Pesci, and a 17 year old newcomer named Cathy Moriarty giving one of the screens most seductive performances ever, as Jake's trophy wife, Vikki LaMotta (YOUR BROTHERS COCK IS FUCKING BIGGER THEN YOURS!), which bring is to the bad news...,
Vikki LaMotta died, Jan. 25, 2005. She and Jake had made peace and remained friends. I hate it when people die. Particularly tough blonde broads.
posted by David on 2/03/2005 05:08:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeSo tonight I'm participating in a read through of what is fast becoming my favorite Charles Busch play, Red Scare at Sunset by Charles Busch as guided by David Zak. Many of you younger readers are only familiar with Mr. Busch via the film adaptations of his classic 'Psycho Beach Party' and 'Die, Mommie, Die!'. Both of these are fun watches but I think Charle's work translates much better on the stage and his dialogue is to die for. The reading is open to the public but there is very limited space. It's at Johnsonese Gallery (867 W. Buckingham, at the corner of Clark and Buckingham underneath the State Bank of Countryside), and it's FREE. Other Handbaggers participating will be Ed Jones, Tim Howard , Tina Haglund and Brannen Daugherty. The actors will be dressed to the 99's and after thinking it over I don't see how I can NOT do it without wearing lipstick and a wig- sort of a half drag look. We'll see what I can come up with when I get home tonight. Drag-in-a-Box.
SCARRIE NEWS- We have a director! The fabulous Ms. Margot Bordelon. Margot is a David Cerda discovery. I was turned on to Margot's directorial stylings went I went to visit Miss Tracy Repep in Seattle. Tracy told me to check out a production of Psycho Beach Party that, even in 95 degree heat, was utterly hilarious, original and dead on. Chris looked at me after the show and said, 'You have to find out more about this director'. Guess what I found out? She was moving to Chicago! She's interning at Steppenwolf and after getting to know her better I was convinced she'd be a good choice for sifting through the very female complexities of SCARRIE. Even that old broad Hickson agreed- of course he did the sensible thing and actually checked out her references, which I might never had done, since I'm a Gemini and think from my gut or my heart or my penis, whichever happens to have the loudest thought at the moment.
posted by David on 2/02/2005 05:23:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeHere's Johnny!
He was the best.
posted by David on 2/01/2005 08:25:00 PM | Link |
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