|
|
|
|
FUN LINKSChicago TheaterARFTCo and also in Los Angeles...and also in Baltimore...Blogs We LoveA Hole In The Head People We LoveAndi World POSEIDON!The Official Carol Lynley Home Page Handblog Archives
10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003 And also...David interviews Margaret Cho |
read the handblog...3/31/2007My Way of Life- The Countdown-Human Resources
The Countdown. Oh, I know them too... posted by David on 3/31/2007 06:54:00 AM | Link |
3/30/2007 As April 24 approaches I am desperately banging my head against a wall to jar my creativity. Completed Two new POSEIDON songs- 2 Joan Crawford Goes to Hell Again songs- one more to go (Aaron wrote one) Opening number, A Handbag Happening In Progress Showgirls Valley! - I've decided to Valley of the Dolls as told by Gilbert and Sullivan Stilted dialogue to bridge acts. That other Joan Crawford song What song? What are you talking about? Not Without My Daughter That child beauty pageant show thingee... posted by David on 3/30/2007 07:57:00 PM | Link |
3/28/2007My Way of LifeWhy I hated school, reason #784.posted by David on 3/28/2007 11:17:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeI don't even know if this is funny since I can't hear it at work but the idea and the opening is hilarious looking. posted by David on 3/28/2007 08:51:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life- SuperheroYour results:You are Hulk
Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test I snatched (hee-hee, I said 'snatched') this from Rader's blog. Huh? I'm the Hulk? I was almost Supergirl! posted by David on 3/28/2007 06:54:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life- Hurt againSo I took a chance. Grant it, it was a crazy silly chance but occasionally I still have hope for mankind. You see, last week and this past Monday, as I folded, stuffed and stamped 100's of benefit mailers I had the television on ABC and well, I started watching...Dancing with the Stars. I know! You don't have to say anything, I've already said it to myself. How could I watch that inane show with its b-list, even d-list stars whirling around the dance floor with creepy looking mannequin instructors. I don't know how it happened. Okay, I do know. They opened last weeks season with a bizarre Vegas style version of Ballroom Blitz by The Sweet with all the dancers doing some kind of Showgirls routine to it. That was it. I hadn't been that excited since the Miss USA pageant did Everybody Have Fun Tonight by Wang Chung as a group number. So I started watching the stupid show and immediately fell in love with Paulina Porizkova, the gawky former supermodel in her early 40's. There was just something about her I really liked, and we know she's cool since she's been married to Ric Ocasek for years now. Those bastard Americans voted her off. I suppose I deserve it for becoming so emotionally invested in the cruel lover known as 'Dancing with the Stars'. Darkness.posted by David on 3/28/2007 05:23:00 PM | Link |
3/27/2007My Way of Life My goodness...I sent out the E-Blast about our big benefit, A HANDBAG HAPPENING and instead of instant ticket sales got quite a few e-mails from eager actors about auditioning for Reefer Madness-The Musical, within an hour. I had no idea this very funny show had such a rabid following. Reefer Madness is part of a Summer Camp series we're doing this...summer. We're choosing 3 outside works that fit our mission statement for a smarter then your average bear staged reading at Mary's Attic. The other two pieces are pending which is why I didn't mention them in the e-blast. Any thespians reading this in Chicago should just send their resumes and headshots to info@handbagproductions.org for consideration. posted by David on 3/27/2007 10:32:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life Anna Nicole died of an accidental drug overdose. I'll bet you didn't see that coming. In other shocking news, there have been more attacks in Iraq. posted by David on 3/27/2007 05:35:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life- Little Limping Ratposted by David on 3/27/2007 06:41:00 AM | Link |
3/26/2007My Way of Life Yesterday it hit 79 degrees but I was confined to the Hell in a Handbag sweatshop folding, stuffing and stamping for the benefit mailer. Myself, Aaron Smith, Ed Jones, Michael Miller, Tim Howard and Christopher worked like Nike factory workers for 4 hours straight until we finally had to stop. I think we got about 3/4 of the work done. We watched The Comeback on demand and tried to make the best of it. Look in the mail for your wonderful benefit mailer. Don't you want to see a 5 minute musical version of Showgirls? If you're not on our mailing list, get your ass on there! posted by David on 3/26/2007 04:47:00 PM | Link |
3/22/2007My Way of LifeAndrew Anthos.posted by David on 3/22/2007 08:38:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeWhether or not you agree with Larry Kramer or not, you cannot argue with the passion and eloquence of his convictions. Unfortunately I agree with a lot of what he says. Read the open letter that the LA Times retitled WHY DO STRAIGHTS HATE GAYS? Let's talk about it.posted by David on 3/22/2007 05:15:00 PM | Link |
3/20/2007My Way of Life- Our proud heritageOur ancestors f*cked gorillas.posted by David on 3/20/2007 11:14:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeTechnorati Profileposted by David on 3/20/2007 08:29:00 PM | Link |
3/19/2007My Way of Life- Naomi I have to say I may now be a fan of Naomi Campbell. I mean, she shows up in stilletos to scrub floors. How could you NOT love that? She's got Boy George beat as best dressed NYC community service celebrity hands down! posted by David on 3/19/2007 07:50:00 PM | Link |
3/16/2007My Way of Life- Do they have one with Snoopy? When flowers don't seem appropriate... Who killed Junior? posted by David on 3/16/2007 08:30:00 PM | Link |
3/15/2007My Way of LifeTonight I'm going to see Miss Brigitte in Mack and Mabel and hopefully the girl can tap my troubles away. Even though she doesn't read them she's getting glowing notices and I can't wait to see the big tap number. You just don't see tap numbers anymore. I mean what gay boy hasn't secretly wanted to break out in tap on some joyous occasion? My list of people I've always wanted to see perform but never have will be reduced by one this Saturday. I'm going to see Miss Lesley Gore at the Old Town School of Folk Music a few blocks away from my house! I own most everything there is to own by Lesley (not Leslie) from 60's. Her body of work is truly mountainous. Yes, I love 'It's My Party' but I also love a lot of her lesser known singles. While many saw 'You Don't Own Me' as some feminist anthem, I think it just a girl setting her fella straight. First the scold, then the kiss. I'm really excited to be able to see her at a place like the Olde Towne School rather then some pre-packaged oldies show. She finally came out of the closet a while back and I would imagine it was an incredible strain for her to be a pop icon and a lesbian in the 60's, but she doesn't seem to bitter about it. She was sort of outed in 'Grace of My Heart', the box office dud starring the fabulous Illeana Douglas. Illeana's character who was based on Carol King couldn't figure out how to write a song for what they thought was a squeaky clean pop princess until they discovered she was a lesbian and they wrote a very Lesley Gore-ish tune called 'My Secret Love' or something like that. It was very clever.posted by David on 3/15/2007 10:19:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life Damn, that Mike Miller is good. Come to our benefit or give us money, or both. Please. posted by David on 3/15/2007 05:09:00 PM | Link |
3/14/2007My Way of Life All hail the High Priestess! You know how when you wait to see something that everybody has been raving about usually disappoints? Well, I finally saw The Cobra Woman last night and while there are incredible jaw droppingly whatthehell? moments, I was somewhat disappointed, and I hated to be so disappointed! On the plus side, the film is in GLORIOUS TECHNICOLOR. On the minus side, is the story. I think it was written by the poor chimpanzee that costarred in the film. That chimpanzee is a better actor then Maria Montez. Let's see, should I bother to explain the plot? Okay... this dashing virile white guy is going to marry this exotically beautiful island girl, Tollea, but she gets kidnapped and taken to Cobra Island. It turns out that's where she's originally from. Some old Scottish guy brought her back with him when he visited Cobra Island and was tortured. Outsiders are not allowed on Cobra Island. So the handsome white guy puts on his espadrilles and sails to Cobra Island to get his bride to be back. Handsome guys 'best friend' Sabu, who spends the entire film in short shorts and speaks in pig Latin island talk sneaks along too, and it's a good thing he did because he saves his friend from being eaten by a black panther. Once they're on the island we find out the beautiful native woman is actually the twin sister of the evil queen of the island played by Maria Montez without a hint of distinction between the two. The evil queen, Naja, and her handmaidens are dressed as cocktail waitresses at a harem themed casino in Las Vegas. The best part of the film is when the evil queen does this frenetic dance, like Divine in Female Trouble. She has the shaking fits and then points at people who have to be sacrificed to the Gods for not giving her enough gold. The victims scream as they are carried away and the evil twins gown is unbelievably stylish. It turns out the 'nice' island girls grandmother, the Queen of the island (Queen with no power) sent her mentally retarded servant, poor Lon Chaney , Jr. to kidnap her so the nice twin could take the mean ones place. How she planned to execute this plan once she got her to the island is never explained. A LOT of things in this movie are never explained. The film ends with the bad people dying and the white guy and Sabu returns to the island with a monkey but without the good twin. He realizes he has to sacrifice his love to save the people of the island. Of course she surprises him by being on the boat saying the island people will be fine with her dead grandmothers maid and mentally retarded guard as rulers. The End. No, I'm not kidding, that's how it ends. posted by David on 3/14/2007 06:22:00 PM | Link |
3/13/2007My Way of LifeChris is out of town in Minnesota. Since I haven't had a stomach attack in over 2 weeks maybe I'll go on a donut binge and catch up on the movies that chris never wants to watch. I have a slew of unopened DVD's. It's horrible. There are children in Africa who want to see the special edition of Double Indemnity yet here I am with an unopened copy of it in my home laying around for months! I think I'm going to watch a bootleg DVD I acquired yesterday. It's called The Cobra Woman with Maria Montez and Sabu and people have been raving about this one for quite a while now. I also have a special edition copy of Showgirls I need to take a look at. For years Showgirls is the top movie people have asked me to Cerdalize. While, I don't intend on producing a stage version (that's supposedly already in the works), I will write a couple of diddys for our benefit with the new and improved title. Now it's call a Handbag Happening. I saw the proofs for Michael Millers graphics and I got caught up in his groovy early 70's graphics, so a Happening it is.posted by David on 3/13/2007 11:13:00 PM | Link |
3/11/2007My Way of LifeLast night some of the Dames and I went to see Trista in Porchlight's production of Assassins. A beautiful production it was. Great actors, lights and set. Trista was wasted, but she's one of us so we went to support her.I had a glamourous Saturday. I have an annoying cold so I only left the house to pick up dry cleaning and buy more cold medicine. I ran into Hickson at the dry cleaners and we had a fistfight and complemented each on our new hairdos. I was actually wearing a hat since I was too lazy to comb my hair today and I didn't shave. I did laundry, cleaned the front and dining room and read more of my Ludlam biography and ate like a pig. I will not go to sleep until I finish another song for The Joans, the rock band that will make it's debut for our Handbag fundraiser, April 24. Buy our tickets now, bitch. Catchy tagline, huh? posted by David on 3/11/2007 05:52:00 AM | Link |
3/09/2007My Way of Life- Whatever Happened to Kimmie? In case anyone was wondering... posted by David on 3/09/2007 08:03:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life- I love the nightlife Last night mother stayed up until 1 in the morning judging the Windy City Gay Idol singing competition. I was part of a trio of celebrity judges that offered some rather glib comments after each singer's efforts. I had reservations at first because I have never been a big fan of American Idol the pre-fab pop machine star maker but hey, as Ethel Merman said. 'You gotta keep up with the times kid!'. There were 17 goddamned contestants last night and they were all MEN. There were so many really cute slim-hipped boys there that I felt fat. I squeezed into my super$$$ J Lindeberg pants that BC Kalz talked me into getting in 2002 and my fave Laundry Industry 'X' shirt. I kept my Prada glasses on to look smart and to hide the meteoric blemish on my face. The liquor flowed freely and I sat there with my soda water at midnight in nightclub on a school night. Luckily Peter Mavrik kept me company all night. Love that boy. I also got to know a lot about Teriyaki, Hydrates local diva in residence who was a lot of fun and not as scary as I was told she would be. Amy Matheny is a kickass hostess as well. The other judge was Nightlines editor in chief Kirk Williamson. Stephen Rader was MIA, the bitch. The contestants were for the most part, very good. As most of you know, I try to look on the bright side of everything... but good Lord, I can't lie- unless it gets me something I want very badly. I guess I'm known for my Simonish/Joan comments when called for. I try to say what everyone's thinking. HOW ARE YOU GOING TO REPAY ME FOR THE 3 MINUTES YOU HAVE JUST STOLEN FROM MY LIFE! posted by David on 3/09/2007 05:31:00 PM | Link |
3/08/2007My Way of LifeI'm still struggling with this on again off again cold I seem to have acquired from Christopher this week so I took it easy last night. I'm reading the Charles Ludlam biography my friend Richard got me for Christmas. I suppose I'm a dumbed down version of Ludlam. We do have a lot in common but he's much more extreme and intelligent and reckless then me. I was just a little luckier in the life threatening sexually transmitted disease departments. Parts of the book are fascinating and parts of it are rather boring to me but I hate to skip anything, even when there are references that I don't particularly understand or give a shit about. This always brings back that 'I didn't graduate from college' chip I have on my shoulder. I don't know a lot basic theater and philosophical facts due to the fact that I wasn't really present for the year I did go to college. I had discovered liquor and the nightlife and to me, the choice was easy. I have very smart friends who make esoteric references I don't understand but they never make feel like a moron. I just usually say, "I don't understand'. David and Edward are familiar with this drill. They're really smart, but not snooty, but when I go to one of their parties I'm always afraid someone will try to talk to me about Elizabethan poetry to which I may nervously reply, 'I didn't know Liz Taylor wrote poetry', then laugh and run to the bathroom and sob uncontrollably.posted by David on 3/08/2007 08:40:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life- Yes, another test...I am the 80's Grand Wizard...det442, you're now logged in! Below you'll find your test result. After, continue on to your homescreen to discover what we're about. continue to OkCupid homescreen >
posted by David on 3/08/2007 04:54:00 PM | Link |
My Way of Life- Yes, another test...I am the 80's Grand Wizard...det442, you're now logged in! Below you'll find your test result. After, continue on to your homescreen to discover what we're about.
posted by David on 3/08/2007 04:54:00 PM | Link |
3/07/2007My Way of LifeI haven't much to report. I'm high on cold medication and I finished a song from Joan Crawford Goes to Hell Again for the benefit, April 24. You can also buy advances tickets to the benefit online. Oh joy, oh rapture!posted by David on 3/07/2007 09:18:00 PM | Link |
3/06/2007My Way of Life- Another silly testThanks to Mr. Rader... What do they mean 3% flair? Ain't I got FLAIR?
This test tracked 4 variables. How the score compared to the other people's:
posted by David on 3/06/2007 09:35:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeWhy don't they use this in the recruitment ads? Fools.posted by David on 3/06/2007 09:15:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeNo one eats paste like my bitch, Scooter.posted by David on 3/06/2007 09:05:00 PM | Link |
Boostin' on YouTubePlease watch it, rate it and comment! this was added to the remount of Caged Dames and it's turned into one of my favorite songs. Tina sells the hell out of it and watch as Myrtle(Adrienne Smith)demonstrates her muscle control skills. Thanks to Richard Bluestein and Peter Mavrik! posted by David on 3/06/2007 07:59:00 PM | Link |
3/05/2007My Way of Life
You are The MagicianSkill, wisdom, adaptation. Craft, cunning, depending on dignity. eloquent and charismatic both verbally and in writing, The Magician is the male power of creation, creation by willpower and desire. In that ancient sense, it is the ability to make things so just by speaking them aloud. Reflecting this is the fact that the Magician is represented by Mercury. He represents the gift of tongues, a smooth talker, a salesman. Also clever with the slight of hand and a medicine man - either a real doctor or someone trying to sell you snake oil. What Tarot Card are You? I swiped this quiz from Stephen Rader's blog! I should write but I'm slow enough as it is at work today. I was a guest judge at Windy City Gay Idol last night at Stargaze. It was the opening night for the contest and surprisingly, I had a lot of fun. The night was much like a very famous Clint Eastwood spaghetti western, and the contestants have to sing along to Karaoke music. Sitting there with the very rowdy group of mainly lesbian patrons reminded me of my days at The Closet in the mid 80's. Things really haven't changed when it comes to loud dykes that drink a lot. They end up screaming Mr. Roboto at the top of their lungs on Sunday night. I think they're a little more fun then the boys. The thing I noticed the most was all the body modification. Now when someone sports tattoos and a mohawk they're not treated like they have the plague. posted by David on 3/05/2007 08:09:00 PM | Link |
3/02/2007My Way of Life- RIP Bruce BennetAnother one from the golden age is gone. Better known as Mildred's first husband, the cheating Bert, in Mildred Pierce.posted by David on 3/02/2007 09:11:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeThis is pretty brilliant. Hello, Lifetime???posted by David on 3/02/2007 07:28:00 PM | Link |
My Way of LifeMitzi Gaynor is a pro. A GODDAMNED PRO!I think Brigitte does something like this in Mack and Mabel. posted by David on 3/02/2007 05:04:00 PM | Link |
3/01/2007My Way of Life- Hair, Songs and Shows Last night I went to the Aria beauty parlor and had my hair done by the infamous BC Kalz. BC or 'Brian' as I know him. He's been doing my hair for years now. I got rid of my Goldie Hawn- Beetle bangs/shag and went for short. Short for me, that is. I always feel 20 minutes younger with shorter hair and after a year of sciatica, restless leg syndrome and now acid reflux I desperately need that 20 minutes.  Ms. Brigitte opened Mack and Mabel last night at the Circle Theater in Forest Park, IL (yes, there is such a place), and I'm sure she tapped her way into the critics hearts. The Jeff Committee certainly liked them because they are recommended. How lovely! I will be going to see M & M March 15, on industry night with some of the other Dames. It also features Jon Steinhagen, Shawn Quinlan, Eric 'Dreamboat' Lindahl and Peter Storms as the Music Director, so I sort of have to go. Not that I don't want to go. Speaking of Jeff recommended, tonight I'm going to see the Teapot Scandals, the musical about the corrupt Harding administration by Jon 'Busiest guy in the world' Steinhagen. It's at the Theater Building Chicago and if you call and say 'Harding' with your reservation you get a discount on Thursday nights only.  I'm writing like the wind to fulfill my song commitment for the April 24 Handbag benefit. What rhymes with Fatwa? posted by David on 3/01/2007 06:50:00 PM | Link |
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
Home | Blog | Company | Contact | History | Support ©2004 Hell In A Handbag Productions Website credits |
 |
